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The ITT List

Monday, Jan 28, 2008, 2:47 pm

GOTCHA, MITT!

By Jarrett Dapier
OMG! MITT ROMNEY TOTALLY ATE SOME FRIED CHICKEN TODAY BUT PEELED THE SKIN OFF BEFORE HE ATE IT! THAT'S RIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE DECISIVE PROOF: MITT ROMNEY IS A FAKE! HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THE SOUTH OR ITS PEOPLE!!! VOTE FOR HUCKABEE! AMERICA DEMANDS A PRESIDENT WHO WILL AMEND THE CONSTITUTION, DESTROY THE RIGHTS OF WOMEN, EVISCERATE THE RIGHTS OF GAYS AND LESBIANS, QUARANTINE AIDS PATIENTS, BUT, MOST IMPORTANTLY, WILL SIT IN THE OVAL OFFICE GOBBLING FOWL THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE DONE!!!

Interview with the violated chicken to follow.

Jarrett Dapier is a former assistant publisher at In These Times. Previous work for ITT includes interviews with playwright Christopher Shinn and Fugazi guitarist, Ian Mackaye. He currently works with teens at the Evanston Public Library where he runs a recycled drumming program and directs stage adaptations of young adult literature. He lives in Evanston, IL.

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