Federal Lawsuit Is Least of Goldman’s Problems!!! ;)

Fabrice “Fabulous Fab” Tourre, the architect of the $1 billion Goldman Sachs mortgage-fraud scandal, testified before a Senate subcommittee yesterday about his role in the deal and some uncomfortably mushy emails to his girlfriends. Though decidedly more eloquent and nerdy than Tiger Woods’ texts, they revealed a cavalier attitude about the ethics of the deal and a penchant for exclamation points and winky faces. Goldman is accused by the SEC of creating mortgage securities that were designed to fail, earning the firm hefty profits. The firm denies any wrongdoing. Tourre looked visibly uncomfortable Tuesday as subcommittee members discussed the Goldman-released emails that disclosed his responsibility for “these monstruosities [sic]!!!” “Anyway, not feeling too guilty about this, the real purpose of my job is to make capital markets more efficient and ultimately provide the US consumer will more efficient ways to leverage and finance himself, so there is a humble, noble and ethical reason for my job ;) amazing how good I am in convincing myself!!!” he wrote. Never before has an emoticon been so incriminating. Equally disturbing is the fact that he seems just as excited for the “intellectual masturbation” (collateralized-debt obligations that he created) as the real thing. Tourre's girlfriends, a fellow Goldman employee and a Columbia University Ph.D student, responded with equally gooey messages: “I'd love nothing more than just curl in your arms, feel the warmth of your skin and just stay there smiling for hours!” the Goldman employee wrote. But at the hearing, Tourre cried privacy and said, “The last week has been challenging for me and my family, as I have been the target of unfounded attacks on my character and motives.” If Tourre thinks the hearing was difficult, he should remember what happened to the back of Woods’ escalade.