From the Department of Weird Things to Get Uptight About: An advice-seeker asks digital manners mavens Farhad Manjoo and Emily “Dear Prudence” Yoffe if it’s rude for a pet sitter or a babysitter to record shows on an employer’s DVR without explicit permission.
In a brief for sanity, Manjoo argues that if you’ve already given the sitter permission to watch TV and demonstrated how to use the AV setup, then of course it’s okay for a sitter to record a program. At his house, the DVR is just part of the TV.
If you’re generally okay with your sitter watching TV, Manjoo says, you should prefer they pre-record programs to watch after the kid goes to bed.
He adds that it’s polite for the sitter to delete the episode after watching so as not to clutter up the employer’s trove of saved TV. He thinks if a sitter wants to record a whole season of something, they should ask.
In a brief for paranoia, Dear Prudence argues that it’s rude for a sitter to record a show without asking because they might catch a glimpse of the employer’s saved shows, and that’s a bridge too far. The help shouldn’t risk stumbling upon their boss’s cache of Real Housewives episodes.
Prudence seems to be saying that a sitter shouldn’t dare to DVR without explicit permission, even if the boss shows her how it works.
Obviously, if employer wants to make rules about the DVR, that’s fine – but the onus is on her to spell out those limits during the TV orientation, as she would during the fridge orientation (i.e,”help yourself to a snack, but leave the mini yogurts”). Otherwise, in this day and age, short-term DVR privileges are part and parcel of TV privileges.
Prudence opines that “you don’t want people seeing you’ve been doing it” – by “it,” she means taking the time to record a particular show, rather than watching whatever’s on. Because “you’re an employee.” So, dutiful employees with TV privileges watch whatever’s on? Like you’re insulting your employers’ cable if you pick and choose?
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